Saint Nancy

SAINT NANCY

On a Saturday afternoon, in Washington, D. C., an aide to House
Speaker Nancy Pelosi visited the Bishop of the Catholic cathedral in D.C.
He told the Cardinal that Nancy Pelosi would be attending the next day's
Mass, and he asked if the Cardinal would kindly point out Pelosi to the
congregation and say a few words that would include calling Pelosi a
saint.

The Cardinal replied, "No. I don't really like the woman, and
there are issues of conflict with the Catholic Church over certain of
Pelosi's views."

Pelosi's aide then said, "Look. I'll write a check here and now
for a donation of $100,000 to your church if you'll just tell the
congregation you see Pelosi as a saint."

The Cardinal thought about it and said, "Well, the church can
use the money, so I'll work your request into tomorrow's sermon."

As Pelosi's aide promised, House Speaker Pelosi appeared for
the Sunday worship and seated herself prominently at the forward left side of
the center aisle.

As promised, at the start of his sermon, the Cardinal pointed
out that Speaker Pelosi was present. The Cardinal went on to explain to
the congregation, "While Speaker Pelosi's presence is probably an honor to
some, the woman is not numbered among my personal favorite personages. Some of her most egregious views are contrary to tenets of the Church, and she tends to flip-flop on many other issues. Nancy Pelosi is a petty, self-absorbed hypocrite, a thumb sucker, and a nit-wit. Nancy Pelosi is also a serial liar, a cheat, and a thief. I must say, Nancy Pelosi is the worst example of a Catholic I have ever personally witnessed. She married for money and is using her wealth to lie to the American people. She also has a reputation for shirking her Representative obligations both in Washington , and in California . The woman is simply not to be trusted."

The Cardinal concluded, "But, when compared with Pres. Obama,
House Speaker Pelosi is a saint."