10: leaves a bloody sneakerprint on carpets seized by the feds
9: automatically begins running when in the presence of Roddy White
8: prototype fashioned out of dog pelt dug up from 'cuzzins' backyard that you know nothing about
7: American issue: dogs face painted on shoe, Phillipines version: has actual dogs head sewn on shoe by 7 year old girl shackled to stitching machine
6: Dr Scholls unable to cover up 'decomposing' smell
5: makes white boys from Gwinnet wearing them look like clowns
4: while they may make you run faster, your throwing arm decreases accuracy when worn
3: if you click them together and say 'there's no place like home' your transported to jail ( OZ )
2: forget the shoehorn, to get these puppies off, your gonna need a 'breaking stick'
1: rips the tongues out of all the other shoes in the closet
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